An Ode to Da Gim

I found a neat feature on the Tiny Love website - for those of you who don't know the company, or don't have any reason to know them, they make really great, high-quality toys that are designed to match the things that babies can see and do, and what they're trying to learn, at various ages (and that are just great toys to begin with, in addition to all that conehead research-scientist stuff). Play with it for a while, especially those of you who have babies yourselves. It really gives a ton of information about what's going on in a wide range of your kids' abilities at a given age. Which not only helped me, at least, think up some things that I can do to keep His Poopiness busy, but also explained why he's doing some of the things that are otherwise just pretty darn weird.

But this post isn't about that - it's about Gimli, our poor, neglected, bored, ignored little ("little" HA!) puppy ("puppy" HA!)... or so he would have us all believe. Here's the reality, caught on camera in spite of his best efforts to look all forlorn and hopeless every time a lens points his way, in hopes some more interesting person (like a grandma, or maybe a sympathetic aunt or two) will swoop down and play with him in the manner to which he was accustomed before That Baby came along and stole the show:

(Mind you, Gimli isn't the only one who has a vested interest in making himself appear as woebegone and hopeless and needing of rescue as possible, in hopes a grandma or two, or maybe an aunt, will come to the rescue. His daddy isn't above a little "creative marketing" either, for the same exact reason. I don't know which of us first came up with this strategy, but I'm not about to let a good idea go to waste just because it came out of our puppy's two - count 'em, two - little brain cells...)

How quickly things have changed... it was the very day Felicia went into labor, after all, that we went for that walk down the driveway with Da Gim and Felicia's very big belly, and Felicia told Gimli, "Don't worry, Gim, I could never love any other creature the way I love you..." Which is true, as far as it goes, since her love for His Poopiness is, indeed, different from her love for the puppy (thank goodness, since I don't think feeding Joshua tons of dog treats every time his daddy's back is turned would be particularly good for him), but she seriously underestimated the Maternal Instinct, as we've already determined. So Gimli's days of wallowing in half an hour of parental love and attention and four-handed petting every morning in the family bed when we first wake up are, well, gone. As are the days when Daddy would take him out for an hour at a time to race around the yard playing tag, or throwing sticks, or taking videos of the puppy's antics - which is not to say those days won't come back, once we a) have a yard, and b) have a moment free from baby bottles, baby poop, baby burping, and so forth.

Meanwhile, as far as Gimli is concerned, this whole Baby Thing just hasn't panned out as an investment of time and energy. I mean, he's TRIED giving kisses to the baby, in hopes he'll get a pet or two, or that at a minimum the baby will take him out for a walk, but THAT was a waste of good puppy spit.  But he seems to be willing to wait and keep trying, in hopes he'll eventually get some Puppy Payback out of this Spitup Factory we call a baby.

In the meantime, he strictly imposes his One-Person Rule - the baby gets one, and any surplus humans are Property of The Puppy. Which works pretty well for him, actually. Sure, people do try to break through the Puppy Blockade to get a peek at the baby in spite of Gimli's best efforts, but he's able to wrangle a lot of pets and attention out of them along the way, as he tries to herd them away from the Baby Zone into an area where he can get petting in the manner to which he is accustomed, or at least the manner to which he aspires. And every now and then, a particularly ripe victim falls into his clutches, like so:

Don't worry, Gim. This too shall pass. After all, you were a long-term investment too, and took quite a while to pay off. Sure, you were cute and everything, and very fuzzy, and just one big bundle of luuuuuv... but boy, did you poop and pee a lot, for a while there all over the floor, the couch, the carpets, visiting humans, the bed... You chewed up a lot of stuff, too, including rugs, chair legs, and an endless succession of chew toys (but thankfully, none of Felicia's shoes). And yes, you slept all the time, just like His Poopiness. So have a little patience with the baby. He too will be worth the wait. Eventually.

And before any of us have had a chance to blink, you and Joshua will be racing all over the yard, tumbling down the hill together, tearing up all this landscaping we've worked so hard to put in, getting in trouble with the neighbors together, sharing each other's toys, trading food with each other, coming home with matching poison oak and tick infestations, digging holes in places where we really don't WANT holes dug, and otherwise getting each other in big trouble. So with all that Puppy Payoff waiting for you, just be patient.

I have to warn you, though, Gim:  it's going to get worse before it gets better. 'Cause before too long now, this little tyke is going to start realizing you make a pretty good pull-toy. Don't get too attached to your ears, or your nose, or your tail, there, puppy...